Would you like Orlando Bloom or Ralph Fiennes as your inner editor?

It's Shelley's fault. When she posted about Harrison Ford being her inner editor, I realized I didn't need to be contented with mine--a disembodied monotone voice that never loses an argument and leaves no room for doubt in her highly critical opinions. I decided to re-imagine my inner editor.

[Warning: this frivolous post may nauseate the serious-minded among you, but I promise it is still completely and utterly writing-related. Really.]

Who would I rather have as my inner editor?


Someone who can shoot arrows at my plot holes.

Someone who will cut down the clutter
that sprouts up like bamboo in my story.

Someone who knows patience from having to chip away at a wall with a tiny tool, and who wouldn't mind diving into sewage if it means freedom on the other side.



Someone who knows resilience by having to rely only on his left foot to create.


Someone who knows that being vulnerable and being willing to share authentically, even if it means you open yourself to rejection and misunderstanding, is the way to touch your audience.


Someone who can give me the "Come on, you can do better than that" accusing look, in that irresistible smoldering manner that I cannot but jump back into working.



Someone who knows my every fear and will not buy any of my excuses; and who, although doesn't read fiction, approaches every lecture he gives, every technical or philosophical paper he writes, as telling a story.


[Do you know every single person here? Can you name one thing about each of them? ]

Grab-A-Line Monday, Hot-Dog Edition

The synonym system knew that a dog was similar to a puppy and that boiling water was hot. But it also thought a hot dog was a boiling puppy.


That passage is from a WIRED magazine article on Google searches. Poor boiling puppies! (And poor puppies in those ridiculous outfits)

Incidentally, Mark McVeigh, super-editor turned super-agent, has a blog post on hot dogs today as well. The content is totally different but I thought it was interesting: what are the chances of two blogs devoted to writing and publishing focusing on hot dogs on the same day?

(Now my statistically-minded friends will consider that a challenge...)

Onto GALM proper. Since I am primarily a fiction writer, I will post a line from a fiction. This is from the The Elegance of Hedgehog by Muriel Barbery:

As always, I am saved by the inability of living creatures to believe anything that might cause the walls of their little mental assumptions to crumble.

A big thanks to those of you who came over to comment and to offer memorable lines. Last week, Bish enjoyed this line from The Magician's Elephant by Kate DiCamillo.

Peter could see the magician all too clearly. His beard was long and wild, his fingernails ragged and torn, his cloak covered in a patina of mold. His eyes burned bright, but they were the eyes of a cornered animal: desperate and pleading and angry all at the same time.

Nandini quote from Leviathan by Scott Westerfeld

Deryn felt brilliant, rising through the air at the center of everyone's attention, like an acrobat aloft on a swing. She wanted to make a speech: "Hey, all you sods, I can fly and you can't! A natural airman, in case you haven't noticed. And in conclusion, I'd like to add that I'm a girl and you can all get stuffed!"

And Corey will to back to the Berkshires soon to get her book!

What caught you this week? (besides hot dogs, that is.)

Happy 101

Ever since Tricia tagged me for the Happy Award, I've been thinking about what makes me happy. It's been an excellent antidote for a mind that tends toward the negative. Thanks Tricia!

The only problem is, I couldn't decide which ten I wanted to include. But I do want to do a post on this so I am just going with the first ten things that come to my mind as I write this:

1. The return of my husband's quick wit and seven-year old cheeky grin, which have been in hiding for the past months, thanks to his nasty cancer and (nastier?) treatments.
2. My family enjoying a meal I prepare for them.
3. My children showing kindness and compassion unbidden, especially to each other.
4. Listening to someone talk about their passion: xeriscape in the Rocky Mountain region, chromaticism in Mozart (yes, Mozart, not Wagner or Liszt or any of the other late Romantic composers), types of ferns found in the rain forests of Malaysia.
   
5. My favorite restaurants bustling and keeping their staff, because that means they are treating their customers and staff well, and will stay around for a while.
   
6. Writers who write well getting the recognition they deserve, even when their books are quiet and not trendy.
7. Writers writing, preachers preaching, and bloggers blogging about something close to their hearts instead of being distant from their topics.
   
8. My children's sleeping faces
9. Their giggles.

Their songs and dances when they aren't aware anyone is around.



And, oh, the picture of this puppy:


Much happiness to you!

[A busy Tate Modern Restaurant by Kenudigit; goofy grin by Crazy Baby, happy puppy by B. Rosen. All pictures found on Flikr Creative Commons.]

Thank you, Laurel for this award:



Rules: Answer the following questions with single word answers then pass this along to 5 other bloggers.

Your Cell Phone? Old
Your Hair? Straight
Your Mother? Charming
Your Father? Quiet
Your Favorite Food? Nuts
Your Dream Last Night? Forgotten
Your Favorite Drink? Coffee
Your Dream/Goal? Author
What Room Are You In? Untidy
Your Hobby? Cooking
Your Fear? Blindspot
Where Do You See Yourself In Six Years? Calmer
Where Were You Last Night? Home
Something That You Aren't? Daring
Muffins? Blueberry
Wish List Item? iPad
Where Did You Grow Up? Malaysia
Last Thing You Did? Ate
What Are You Wearing? Jeans
Your TV? Unwatched
Your Pets? Deceased
Friends? Super
Your Life? Blessed
Your Mood? Upbeat
Missing Someone? Friend
Vehicle? Vue
Something You Aren't Wearing? Perfume
Your Favorite Store? None
Your Favorite Color? Soothing
When Was The Last Time You Laughed? Bedtime
Last Time You Cried? Children
Your Best Friend? Husband
One Place You Go To Over And Over Again? Grocery
Facebook? Manageable Favorite Place To Eat? Patricia's

I pass this award to
Storyqueen
Courtney Reese
CKHB
Megan Rebekah
Tricia (I'll be doing your list next!)

Happy weekend!

Here comes the next strain: W26T3*

MG Higgins tagged me just when I was tired but hyper and couldn't sleep. Not responsible for the randomness of the answers.

1) What's the last thing you wrote? What's the first thing you wrote that you still have?
A new chapter in my current WIP, a YA novel. First thing I wrote I still have? Uh...

2) Write poetry?
Too intimidated.

3) Angsty poetry?
Angsty other things but not poetry.

4) Favorite genre of writing?
Contemporary; middle grade, YA, short story. Okay I don't know.

5) Most annoying character you've ever created?
A whiny violinist boy who has no problems taking the best for himself and then complained about it.

6) Best plot you've ever created?
Uh...

7) Coolest plot twist you've ever created?
The one where the tall guy who has the bag is not the tall guy with the bag.

8) How often do you get writer's block?
What's that? Darn, what just happened to my perfect idea? Why can't I think of words that are meaningful; no, appropriate; no, profound. Everything I've just written is terrible. What should I write now? Doodle, doodle, noodle, poodle...wonder what's in the pantry.

9) Write fan fiction?
No.

10) Do you type or write by hand?
Both.

11) Do you save everything you write?
No.

12) Do you ever go back to an idea after you've abandoned it?
Yes. Because who knows what lies just under all the possibilities that I've tried to squeeze out of them but didn't succeed? Who is to say the next one won't reveal gold? Who dares call me a pessimist?

13) What's your favorite thing you've ever written?
How about asking which of my children you want me to sell to the slave traders?

14) What's everyone else's favorite story you've written?
Maybe the one with the pot. The cooking kind, you! What were you thinking?

15) Ever written romance or angsty teen drama?
My current WIP is teen. Has drama. And angst. Will it be an angsty teen drama? Who knows?

16) What's your favorite setting for your characters?
The kitchen. Or cafeteria. Hmm, does that reveal my fascination with food?

17) How many writing projects are you working on right now?
Writing new scenes for a YA novel; tweaking a MG novel, and three short stories. Ooh I just got a new idea: chimps in space! Must start research for that. Or, I know, a vampi...no, I guess not. But chimps are good. They're fun and smart, right? They can be rocket scientists, who also know kung-fu.

18) Have you ever won an award for your writing?
A couple of second places for the MG novel, and a 1st place for a short story.

19) What are your five favorite words?
Uh....

20) What character have you created that is most like yourself?
The goofy 12-year old percussionist who falls down a lot? Or maybe the secret culinary chef who is suffocating in her current good-girl role?

21) Where do you get your ideas for your characters?
People I know and characteristics I see in random people

22) Do you ever write based on your dreams?
No. I don't know why though, because they always made perfect sense when I am dreaming.

23) Do you favor happy endings?
Depends. When I am grumpy, every one in my story suffers. (Did you think I was joking?)

24) Are you concerned with spelling and grammar as you write?
Yes. It's a great procrastination tool.

25) Does music help you write?
No. My ears wander over and I can't think in words.

26) Quote something you've written. Whatever pops in your head.
Uh...

I am tagging
Cheryl
Bish
Beth


*MG compared this tagging thing to the spreading of the H1N1 virus, so I've named this one the Write 26 things and Tag 3 people strain.

Sozzled by sanguineous suppurations

The following are words from a book I read recently. I'd never come across these words and jotted them down. Any guess as to which book these words populate? It's a book I've referred to a couple of times.


effulgence

minatory

flocculent

effluvium

feint

lassitude

stentorously

miasma

vituporetions

derisory

effluvia

purloined

etiolated

velutinous

quotidian

perspicacity

succubus

gambolling

somnambulist

eructations

prelapsorian

civet

craquelured

sanguineous

assegais

sozzled

fatuous

congeries

crepitant

ignominious

*by this time I am wondering if the author is just making words up"


plangent

torsion

truculent

suppurations

perfidy

catafalque

littoral

anabasis

crapulent

*this last one has got to be a made up word!*

How many of these words do you know? And how many do you plan to use three times in a sentence today?

It's Megan Rebekah's fault

She wrote about what to wear when she gets a publishing deal, which got me thinking about what to wear for those special publishing moments:

For an evening affair, An LBD with these shoes:



For day time events, these babies with a chocolate brown and pink outfit:


They're both from Anthropologie, for those of you who like such things as cute shoes and slightly funky outfits that don't really go that much on sale.

Grab-A-Line Monday: An announcement

Have you been bowled over or gobsmacked or stunned or awed or amazed by a sentence? Isn't that the most OUT-OF-THIS-WORLD feeling?

I thought I'd start a new tradition here at my blog, with the uber-catchy title of

Grab-A-Line Monday

Each Monday I'll post a sentence that made me glad I love reading.

And what's more, if you call now, I'll send you a set of ginsu knives free, absolutely free. Wait. Wrong channel.

Let's try that again. And what's more, I'd like to invite you to join me by posting a sentence that made you stop and think and wonder. And if you want to link it to your blog and invite your readers to join in, we'd all have a blast.

Celebrate language!
Celebrate communication!
Celebrate expression!
Celebrate writers!

[I promise I will not bombard you with the over-abundance of exclamation points and centering and colors and all-capss after this post. Unless, of course, I am so overwhelmed by the responses that I absolutely must jump up and down and yell and dance.]

I Won A Fun Pun Contest

Can you guess the title of this cute drawing?


I did! And it totally made my day!

Check out the creative mind of MG Higgins, who not only writes but draws and has a fabulous sense of humor.

Decisions, decisions

Kindle or Sony
Sony came up with a new version of the stylish E reader with 3G, and Kindle is tied to Amazon, who will one day take over the world, but Nathan Bransford prefers to read on his iPhone.

Decision: wait till the newness settles. A girl who grew up in a household with a 14-inch B&W TV till years after everyone else has bought their color TV doesn't need to become an early, or even semi-early, adopter of this new technology.

iPhone or Palm Pre
So many people are doing that thumb-and-index-finger motion to look up maps and restaurant reviews on their phones that my old-fashioned flip-open-to-say-hello is acquiring a retro status. Plus it is still working so well after so many years I can't justify a new purchase. Maybe I'll make it an incentive: I'll get a new phone when I get a contract. You hear that, stockholders of phone manufacturers? Work your Jedi power, your Vulcan mindmeld in the publishing industry so I'll be able to get a new phone!

Decision: stick with retro, ginormous phone.

Crutcher and Halse Anderson
Decision: gonna read 'em all. All, I say, ALL!!!

Choices, choices

Kindle or Sony E-reader
iPhone or Palm Pre
Halse Anderson or Crutcher?

Wait, not mutually exclusive.

Yay!

The Letter G

Over at the Drift Record, Julie Larios wrote a post on the letter "P" in which she listed things she loves that begin with the letter. She sent me "G" so I can play as well. So here is my list:

Grandma: my 95-lb hero, who woke up every morning at 5 and spent her day doing work and serving others without complaints. Her selfless attitude was never a show, but quietly lived. Mother Teresa had the world's respect, but my Popo will also have my adoration.


Grin: grinning faces, others and our own, are the best antidote to feeling blue.

[parka by Jasmic; grinning girl by mia3 mom; miilo grinning by Liz Henry]

Guffaw: and if grinning isn't enough to express your boundless joy, go right ahead and guffaw!

Ginger: great with chicken and fish, and settles an unruly stomach

[ginger, onions and garlic by vieux bandit.
All pictures found on Flickf]

Garlic: I don't know many cultures whose food doesn't include it, as seasoning or aromatic.



Microplane grater: I don't usually like tools that are super specialized. I mean, why would I need a special asparagus steamer when I can steam just about anything in my wok? And what can't I cut with my knives and cutting board? But this little tool is great for grating cheese and zesting citrus fruits without getting the bitter white bits.






Genius: where would our lives be without Mozart and Picasso and Da Vinci?








Geeks: why are smart people considered uncool just because they don't have good tastes in clothing?

Gorgeous, gargantuan and ginormous: how can I not give in to the grandiosity of these superlative adjectives?

Gentleness: a mother cradling her baby, a man stroking the hair of his beloved, a young child holding the hand of his grandmother, a teacher's voice to soothe a student's disappointment: nothing melts me as easily as tenderness shown to another.

Gratitude: feeling sorry for myself? Grumpy? Grouchy? Misunderstood? Disrespected? Giving thanks is the best way to regain perspective.

And finally Grace, which needs no description.

Feel free to add your favorite things beginning with the letter G in the comments section. And if you wish to play, I'll send you a random letter.